As a people pleaser, you are at the whim of the outside world; as a Soul Pleaser® youare writing your own story. When you remember that you are a loving creative energy being, you are empowered to create the life you choose without seeking approval from anyone else, including people from your past’. There is a saying that you can’t pour from an empty cup, but it’s not until I experienced being “filled up” with love that I have been able to truly understand this. Tracy gently guides you through the process of beginning to awaken to your true purpose, and helps you to understand why it’s truly alright to embrace who you are. No longer do you have to hide behind walls you have built to protect yourself from the harm of the outside world. You will discover the secrets to understanding how you feel, why you feel like that and how to move through your life with ease and full awareness of what’s happening. You’re a chameleon, shape-shifting to be whatever different people at work need you to be in that moment

Sometimes you aren’t listening to your body because you’re listening to everybody else’s expectations.” -Ann Voskamp Start to recognise when people-pleasing tendencies come up (Picture: Getty Images) Why people-pleasing happens in the familyWhat this process has done for me is provide a gateway to love, to joy, and to freedom. It has allowed meto create the life I choose, without needing permission or approval from others. Learning that this is my choice is setting me free to be and do what I want, and that freedom feels amazing! The only people who get upset when you set boundaries are those who benefited from you having none.” Why do we often do things? It is because of the result we want that we are trying to manipulate. Maybe it is just for a simple “thank you”. Tracy believes that if you change your “Why” to “bliss”, if you do things for the joy of it, you are aligned with your soul. It is the joy and mindfulness incorporated in the things that you do which is what leads you to be a soul pleaser.

At a young age, we can interpret our parent’s emotions as approval or disappointment, which is where the habit is formed. A book not to be missed and sure to get many dog ears when being read repeatedly whilst taking notes in diaries or highlighting the most applicable parts. Are you often run down and struggle to make time for yourself, or even have forgotten how to say no? Then this is the book for you.I realise that I have done this/do this. And because I do this, then leads to a feeling of remorse. This is HUGE for me, and I now understand the power of giving without expecting anything. Such a big difference. Sometimes, you’re okay with doing something because you know it will please someone else and it pleases you too. The change is warranted when it’s causing you to feel unheard or resentful.’

The deepest pain I ever felt was denying my own feelings to make everyone else comfortable.”– Nicole Lyons

I feel really motivated to implement the tools that Tracy has suggested through this book to help me become more of a soul pleaser. What this process has done for me is provide a gateway to love, to joy, and to freedom. It has allowed me to create the life I choose, without needing permission or approval from others. Learning that this is my choice is setting me free to be and do what I want, and that freedom feels amazing! Particularly powerful for me, which I have been able to put into practice, is that "your choices are either driven by fear or inspired by love." I have always had trouble making decisions. I now realise this was usually due to the fear story I created in my head. This awareness alone has me making decisions with far more confidence and has given me the ability to make a wise decision by understanding when my hesitance or eagerness is based on love or fear.

There is a huge cost to your soul; no dignity, no honesty, no opinions or thoughts of your own, and no you, are just some of the costs.”– Dr. Anne Brown Tracy Secombe is the author of From People Pleaser To Soul Pleaser and a coach who works to help people connect with who they’re really meant to be. She breaks down some common signs that you might be a people-pleaser in the workplace. It’s not about being what everyone wants you to be, it’s about being yourself and finding someone who truly loves you for what you are.”

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People-pleasing can happen in all our worlds, from work to relationships, but it’s especially common in the context of family. Having been a huge fan and avid follower of Tracy’s work since 2018, when I heard she was writing a book, it went straight to the top of my must-read list! Tracy Secombe has helped thousands of people pleasers to become Soul Pleasers® after experiencing chronic burnout from chasing recognition her entire life. By following her six simply explained steps, you will remember your true essence of joy and be who you want to be so you can relish in wonderful relationships, health, abundance, and fulfillment.